Acceptance

March 2024

There is a lyric from a song that says, “Radical acceptance feels like surrender,” which then may have one pondering whether acceptance is the same as giving up or giving in. And are acceptance and surrender the same thing?

Acceptance can mean leaning in or embracing something that is unwanted or uncomfortable, and in some cases unexpected. Acceptance can bring peace and it can mean turning the corner from asking “why me?” to “what now?” In other words, claiming your authority, reframing your life, and adjusting your story as many times as needed.

However, acceptance isn’t a failure. It’s a choice. It doesn’t mean the issue is resolved, it means the hard work has been done to be able to live forward instead of backwards. One of the lessons this writer has learned is that even if the answers to hard questions are revealed, it doesn’t change the outcome, so what is left is the choice to accept and make different decisions and a chance to feel empowered.

The ”Big Book” of Alcoholics Anonymous says the following: “When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing, or situation – some face of my life – unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing, or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment.” In other words, accepting life completely on life’s terms.

The road to acceptance can be incredibly difficult, full of doubt and anger, fear, and a myriad of other emotions. It takes enormous energy and time to shift into a place of acceptance. It’s hard work but anything worth doing usually is. Acceptance isn’t passive, it’s active. A choice to live in the present, breathing in peace and contentment, knowing that any situation is exactly as it should be. Remember, you don’t have to like it, but here’s something to ponder: do you want to like something, or do you want to be at peace?

The writer Eckhart Tolle wrote this: “Acceptance looks like a passive state, but in reality, it brings something entirely new into this world. That peace, a subtle energy vibration, is consciousness.”

And perhaps, acceptance, like grace, meets us where we are, but does not leave us where it found us.

Where are you on your journey to acceptance?

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